Just finished my comments on other student’s DA pitch.
Now I will break my comments down the comment that I made and talk about the pros and cons of their blog, and also make a self-reflection of my own blog.
The first comment that I gave was on Mai Dang’s blog post,here is the screen shot.
Like I said, I am really interested with the game that she mentioned in her blog which is SIMS. I didn’t know this game before and she said SIMS is one of the most popular video game ever and also the top 1 selling game in worldwide. Although this game seems like pretty amazing , she didn’t introduce the game itself and keep taking about the achievement of this game. For my opinion, I think it is really important to introduce the game itself she wants to focus and expend it on her DA project. As a viewer, I want to know what kind of game SIMS is and how could this game become such a successful game.So I find a link for her which is talking about SIMS itself specifically. After reading this link, people can understand why this game is so popular and successful.
I have leaved my second comments on Rosynguyen’s blog.Here’s the screen shot
Her DA topic is Movies based on video games, I really like this topic because I am a huge fans with Warcraft and Assassin Creed.However, her pitch blog was also confused me because she was talked different things in her video and blog. I was suggested her to make her DA topic become united. So I find two links which can help her DA become better.
The last comment that I gave was on ShuNing’s blog post. Here’s the screen shot.
In ShuNing’s blog post, her DA topic is the mobile games in China which is BIG topic. She chose two games(Honor of King & PUBG) which are very popular in China. I think she made a few mistake in her blog.Firstly, the content of her pitch video and contextual essay was nearly the same. Secondly, her research topic is unclear and need to be more specific.Her pitch video was only 1 minute and 30 seconds long which is not close to 2 minute, she can add some extra stuff such as the background story of Chinese mobile game or why mobile game is so popular in China. Thirdly, she didn’t have any reference under her post. So I find a link for her to fix the problem.
I have to say after finished my comments on other’s blog, I realized that there are lots of things that I can improve on my personal DA project. I made lots of mistake with my grammar and spelling on my blog, didn’t make my DA topic clearly and specifically. My research topic is how does video game make people rich, but I focus too much on other things but not my research question. I did not cover any reference under my blog, which is the thing that I need to fix. I can find all of these problem based on comment other people’s blog, I did make similar mistake with them and I will fix these problem in my rest blog post and video post. It’s a great experienced to find the problem on my blog post by commenting other’s blog. I will improve the quality of my DA project with my classmate, I think it will be another excellent experience!